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Seeing,believing,feeling and voicing our Childhood Trauma

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the unheard voice

Posted on February 16, 2022February 22, 2022 by hayleypearce

The small voice inside her grew louder. Because the woman could not hear it yet, it spoke through her body as illness. This illness tied her tummy in knots. Knots made up of the longing and frustration to be heard. The woman felt the voice every day. It was the Continue Reading

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the gift of a dream

Posted on August 14, 2021August 14, 2021 by hayleypearce
the gift of a dream

The girl dreamt of the moon last night. Its huge, glittering beauty beaming golden light down on her small face, her eyes looking up in loving amazement at its splendour, its size in the night. The moon filled the sky, it was a Super Moon, a gift to all the Continue Reading

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Why do you fight ?

Posted on August 11, 2021August 11, 2021 by hayleypearce

I fight to stay alive. I fight for the beautiful moment called life. I fight when I do not even know I am fighting, it is such a part of me.I fight to be me, to be free, to be still, real, honest. As a child it is all I Continue Reading

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Resilience

Posted on January 25, 2021January 25, 2021 by hayleypearce

Part of the definition of resilience in the dictionary is ‘to be able to spring back into shape after being stretched or compressed’, from the Latin, to leap back. Well I’m trying my best to leap back but I keep falling off my perch, ending up again on the bottom Continue Reading

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what depression teaches me

Posted on December 2, 2020December 2, 2020 by hayleypearce

Reality. My depression shows me reality. It still hurts to breathe some days. It hurts to move, to think, to do. Deep within me is sadness that aches and breaks in tears that create yellow light inside me when they fall endlessly. This is love at the end of pain. Continue Reading

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Feeling fragile

Posted on November 11, 2020November 11, 2020 by hayleypearce

Depression has crept up on me. It was coming on for a while, but I missed the signs this time. Life has thrown other shit at me recently, so I just kept going. At the end of October I was ambushed by it. I knew these emotions were there. They Continue Reading

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the truth will not forget you

Posted on October 15, 2020October 15, 2020 by hayleypearce

The Psychologist John Bowlby stated that children cannot know what they cannot communicate to a parent Having lived this in an abusive childhood I can attest to his words. The odds of claiming the experience of your truth and then voicing it, are against you. For anyone who has grown Continue Reading

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who do they see ?

Posted on October 5, 2020October 11, 2020 by hayleypearce

Who do the police see when they interview survivors of child abuse and choose to not believe them? I know this has happened to so many of you, it’s a devastating fact. A common fact. It’s also happened to me. I wasn’t believed. I reported my child abuse to the Continue Reading

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rabbit love

Posted on September 9, 2020September 9, 2020 by hayleypearce

Rabbit heart I know you. Sweet soul , wise and still you give so much with your gentle being. Here on the ground we are one. Time has no meaning , there is only now. I was prey once too. I know the earth and what she holds for us, Continue Reading

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Storm

Posted on September 7, 2020October 1, 2020 by hayleypearce

I belong to the storm cradled within purple bruised clouds blowing me out across the sky. I am the storm whirring about like the wild wind, above roof tops diving down to the pavements struggling to fly, chaos. A black crow whose wings are pushing out like a jet plane, Continue Reading

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The light lives inside you, remember that when the darkness outside seems overwhelming. Go inside, find the light, search it out and stay with it, always. The light is you, the beautiful child you were and still are. Love her/ him  just love with all you have and the light will grow. It is after all who you are, who you always have been.

Disclaimer

The views and opinions expressed on this blog are my own personal opinions and experiences.  I share what has worked and not worked for me in healing from Complex PTSD, but that does not mean it will work for everyone. We are all different, so if in any doubt seek a professional opinion.

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