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I live with chronic pain. Today I can accept this fact. For a long time I wanted to change my body through working relentlessly with a chiropractor, in the hope that the pain I experienced would somehow disappear, being healed by the readjustments. There have been amazing improvements over the Continue Reading

There are some things so horrifying about child abuse they are unspeakable. What I am about to try to share is one of those things. But I feel that given this is the reality of what adults do to children when they sexually abuse them, and that those children like Continue Reading

29 years ago today I checked myself into an alcohol and drug detox unit. I was a voluntary patient, but there was nothing voluntary about my addiction, it was as necessary to me as breathing. It got me through the day, its most important job, to stop me feeling. All Continue Reading

I’m stuck in a place I don’t want be, having to accept that what I feel is normal and there won’t be the quick recovery that I want. I’ve tried, but my system is down. I am left without the internal joy I normally feel about life. The freedom I Continue Reading

It’s been a long time since I saw you. I think about you most days, I wish it wasn’t that way. We didn’t say goodbye did we ? Because I had to leave as I did, I have been saying goodbye ever since. Hours turning into days, days into all Continue Reading

Last night I dreamt of the Australian ocean. I was paddling in the turquoise blue water, diving under to swim far out, watching the beach. So pristine, so clear a day, just perfect. I felt so happy, so content. Then I was walking on my favourite trail along the coastal Continue Reading

So you think to yourself how much more ? How much longer ? Your brain doesn’t work properly because you’re tired, and you’re wired from the anxiety caused by the nightmare. Your trauma response is to freeze, your brain shuts down, you can’t think. You want to be creative, to Continue Reading

I grew up in Australia from the age of 14. It’s my home, the one I lost without a choice. It was stolen from me when I had to leave, as I’ve written about here before. I miss it every day, but it became so painful to miss, I had Continue Reading

Flashbacks are living, breathing experiences, memories from my childhood which arise in my body and mind. When they are arriving, they bring an energy which is surprising and can feel very uncomfortable, but not always. The energy they unlock can feel very powerful in a good way. The urge to Continue Reading

Not that long ago I started sharing about the true nature of the abuse I suffered as a child. Or rather I started to call it what it really was, without the fear of not being believed, or judged as crazy. Those concerns I had fell away the more trauma Continue Reading